Summertime Sadness
by katieupatree
Summary: "Tomorrow would bring packed suitcases and the long drive home, their summertime hideout a distant memory as they arrived back in the city; back to reality, back to everything that they had been hiding from." A story written for Adora-jia. Season 5, slightly AU. Set in the months between After The Storm and Cloudy With a Chance of Murder.


Hello everyone.

This is a story written for the ever lovely **Adora-jia**, who asked for a story based upon the song Summertime Sadness by Lana Del Rey. I have to admit, it is not a song that I have really ever listened to, but I looked up the lyrics and fell rather in love.  
I didn't quite mean to write this story as I did; it was going to be set in season 4, but ended up being sandwiched between After The Storm and Cloudy With a Chance of Murder.

Enjoy!

**Disclaimer: Everything and everyone belongs to their rightful owners, I am simply borrowing them for a little while.**

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**Summertime Sadness**

The stars were shining just for them that night, forgetting the world and existing only for the love of Richard Castle and Katherine Beckett; bright and sparkling, a blanket of glimmering silver high above the sun kissed beach that would forever remain a part of their lives.  
The roaring waves of the ocean and vast expanse of white sand that had been overrun with people for the entire summer now lay deserted except for the two of them, alone beneath the charcoal sky and desperately clinging to their last night of freedom.

Beckett almost wished that they had returned with the crowds; joined the masses as they piled into people carriers and open topped cars, that they had left before it became too difficult to do so - but their longing to stay had won out, the promise of having a little slice of the world entirely to themselves too great an opportunity to pass up on.  
But now they were without a choice. Tomorrow would bring packed suitcases and the long drive home, their summertime hideout a distant memory as they arrived back in the city; back to reality, back to everything that they had been hiding from. Of course she had known that it couldn't last forever; that their secret months of perfect happiness would have to end eventually, but that didn't make their last night any easier to face, didn't stop the ache that was snaking its way around her heart a little more with each second that passed.

It was getting late, too late to still be sitting on the beach in no more than the softly flowing dress that she had put on earlier that night - blushing as Castle had told her how beautiful she looked as he helped her with the zip, but she just couldn't bear the thought of leaving, wasn't ready to admit that their summer was really over.  
In truth, she wished that they could remain in that exact moment for the rest of their lives – to stay simply as Kate and Rick, sinking into the cool sand as the air buzzed with hopeful electricity, the entire beach alive with the carefree love that reverberated between them. And yes, it was selfish, perhaps even foolish, but Beckett couldn't deny the voice at the back of her mind that was screaming out for the night to never end.

She knew that Castle was allowing her the time that she needed to wander within her own mind, pulling her tight to his chest as they sat with feet buried in the sand, waiting until she could find the words to share her raging thoughts with him.  
It was a comforting embrace that Beckett knew well, and one which she had grown to need without even realising. A silent promise entwined within the love filled kisses pressed against her hair and the soothing hands that ran patterns across her skin; a promise that everything was going to be ok, that together they could conquer the entire world.  
But that night she couldn't find the courage to believe him; the messy jumble of fear and excitement and desperation whirling through her mind was just too overwhelming, leaving her weak and vulnerable and needing his gentle reassurance more than ever before.

Heart beating so fast and terrified that she felt sure he would be able to feel it for himself, Beckett turned herself around in his arms, lips quivering and eyes searching for Castle's, knowing that she had to face up to the sadness that had been eating away at her. Had to stand upon the bridge between teenage dreams and stark realities and accept all that was coming their way; to stare into the heart of a world that might just do all that it could to tear them apart, to force their love to the very edge of destruction.  
The words that had eluded her all night were suddenly spilling out before she had even realised, whispered questions that caught around the edges and stuttered over each syllable.

"_What happens when we get back to the city? I mean, when the world catches up and everybody knows and it isn't just you and I anymore? What happens if we break it; if we break us?"_

"_That won't happen. I promise you, Kate. I promise you now, that no matter what, we will always have each other, we will always win."_

She wanted to believe him so desperately that it hurt, but even the stark and honest certainty with which Castle spoke couldn't quite quell the doubts that shook her words and stung her eyes.  
He was so hopeful, so sure, and yet she still needed more.

"_But, what if we don't? What happens if we go back to the real world and it all falls apart, if we aren't strong enough to survive without the summer?"_

"_Kate, don't you know by now; we are strong enough to survive anything."_

"_But.."_

"_No. There are no buts; no doubts or questions, we are a certainty that cannot be broken. I won't allow you to argue yourself out of happiness, out of the wonders that you so greatly deserve. This is it, this is us, and nothing can ever take that away. I love you, Kate. I love you, and you love me, and that makes us mighty."_

And then she couldn't fight against him any longer, couldn't even if she had wanted to, because she knew in that moment that Castle was right – it didn't matter that she would return to the city not quite feeling at home anymore; that the sand and the sea the stars dancing amidst the darkness would leave her heart heavy with longing, it didn't matter because they had each other and everything else paled in comparison.  
Still enveloped in his arms, she leant up and kissed him with everything that she had to offer; deliberate, passionate, fearless. A kiss unlike any that they had shared before, beautiful and tingled with butterflies. A kiss that held within it a last goodbye to their summer of secret celebrations, and an intrinsic hopefulness for a future that promised to be everything that they had ever dreamed of.

**End.**

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What did you think?  
Please do let me know if you get a moment to do so - good or bad, all feedback is greatly appreciated.

Thank you ever so much for reading,  
Katie

P.s. Bonus points for anyone who finds my not-so-subtle Firefly reference :')


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